ADHD ‘doom piles’ and ‘doom boxes’ can be booby traps for bereaved parents.
I have had time to think and reflect since leaving my permanent job at the end of June, which sounds like a luxury, but for an AuDHD hyperactive bereaved mum with C-PTSD who is far more used to keeping very busy, free time is a mixed blessing.
I spent some time removing the ‘doom pile’ at the top of the stairs yesterday, outside Iggy’s old bedroom that is now my office, a precariously tall pile of ‘things waiting to be put away’, including the paint tins from when we cleared out and redecorated Iggy’s room, four years ago, when we couldn’t bear walking past that closed door any more.
While sorting boxes of clothes set aside for my youngest (they are already too small for them), we stumbled across Iggy’s school backpack and PE kit bag, not unpacked.
My home is full of triggering booby traps like this. It is also full of memories, and I don’t want to leave.
I do want to talk about how bereavement and how grief manifested atypically for me and my family, the convoluted meandering journey.
Maybe others in a similarly tragic situation can relate. Perhaps I can help in some small way.
#AuDHD #Autism #ADHD #bereavement #childLoss #suicide #suicidePrevention
Ausome Charlie 